


Attention, thoughts and Brother

by Spinacheese93



Category: Free!
Genre: Crush, M/M, Multichapter
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-11-26
Updated: 2014-06-09
Packaged: 2018-01-02 16:29:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 13,660
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1059045
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spinacheese93/pseuds/Spinacheese93
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It' just that one time Haru realizes that he had a crush on Makoto. Turns out, everyone in the gang have a crush on Makoto.   Haru-centric</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Attention, thoughts and brother

**Author's Note:**

> Spinacheese93's first fanfic. You'll see some changes in OTP priority in this fic. That's a warning!

Why do Nanase Haruka likes water so much?

  
Haru let himself in the almost full tub, once in a while he would immerse himself completely in the water. He likes the sound when he is underwater. He loves the whole calming effect of the water, in fact. When he is in the water, he was away from everything. Sometimes he would think of the possibilities that one day, people will live underwater, and he wants to be there to experience it. And sometimes he thinks that his thoughts are ridiculous.

  
“Haru-chan!”

  
He peered through the water to see a familiar face. The friendly face that will always take him away from his water time. However, this time around he didn’t feel that much of a drag as before. Now that he is the Vice-President of the Iwatobi High Swimming Club, and everyday after school they have training sessions.

  
“I thought you already dropped the ‘chan’,” Haru said coldly while his chin is still in the water. “Makoto, I would appreciate if you would wait outside while I change, I’m not wearing any swimsuit today.”

  
Haru naked is not something unusual to Makoto, since they did grew up together. However Makoto knows that Haru needed some space. “I guess, the ‘chan’ came back after spending 2 days with Nagisa.”

  
_Speaking of the Devil._

  
Haru heard a distant voice that he immediately identifies as Nagisa’s. And the voice became louder and closer. “Haru-chan, oh Haru-chan. I didn’t know how you would like your mackerel, but I cooked it anyway. I hope you like the Hazuki’s family recipe.”

  
“That’s enough. Let’s go wait for Haru outside,” Makoto said whilst dragging Nagisa, in an apron outside of the bathroom.

  
“And who would’ve thought that the method Mako-chan taught me last week worked!,” Nagisa continued to talk in his usual perky self as they make their way to school. “I can’t wait for the test. By the way, you look cool in glasses. So much like a professional. Like Rei-chan.”

  
Makoto chuckled. “My eyes weren’t that bad. I seldom wear it, because I heard that if you are so accustomed to wearing them, you can’t leave without wearing them anymore. It’s a drag to wear glasses all the time. Just ask Rei.”

  
“What is it about? I heard my name being called.” Rei grabbed Nagisa’s shoulder from behind. “You owe me big time! Last Friday will the last of your ditching-duty-day. You left school way too early and they forced me to do it on your behalf.”

  
_Today is unusually noisy. I wish I am still in the tub._

  
Haru heard his thoughts out loud. He turned and saw Makoto with his upturned eyebrow smile.

  
“For someone who hardly expresses himself through words, your expressions sure is a giveaway, Haruka-senpai,” stated Rei while adjusting his glasses in place.

  
“But, Rei-chan, Haru-chan’s face is always in poker mood. How can you tell? Ah, wait, he’s irritated. You are right, it is quite obvious.” Nagisa said while examining Haruka’s face in a flash.

  
“Well, human are social beings. Not only they are very absorbing to the surroundings, it is also one of our nature to express our feelings, if not by words, through actions and face expressions,” Rei added by quoting a book that he recently read about human personalities.

  
“Well, that just meant that we are getting closer. One day, you will be able to read Haru like I do. Not that I’m good at it.” Makoto said in his usual brotherly tone.

  
“Why are you all concerned with what I was thinking? It’s a waste of time.”

  
Honestly, Haru felt uncomfortable with everybody on to him, trying to guess what he was thinking. Even Makoto’s words somewhat made his heart ache. Makoto was the only one who can guess what he was thinking, that is because him and Makoto have been friends since they were little.

  
“Huh? We just want to be closer. It’s not fair that only Mako-chan knows you. And it’s also not fair that only you get Mako-chan’s attention, ” Nagisa cooed.

  
Nagisa’s statement startled Haruka. It felt like Nagisa had meant his words differently. Somehow it made Haru uneasy.

  
_What’s that supposed to mean?_

  
This time Haru’s thoughts seems to echo into three different voices, his, Makoto’s and also Rei’s.

  
“Haru is only my bestfriend. Just like the both of you. I think I give all of you the same amount of attention. Haru is a bit closer though, like my brother. We did grew up together,” Makoto chuckled and emphasized “Yes, just like a brother.”


	2. The Holiday Dare

Haru took a deep breath as if to dive into a deep blue sea, as he reached the door to his classroom. To Haru, his classroom is as suffocating as the deep blue sea on occasions, which can be either on a day with a wonderful weather, or after a break. The green tie he was wearing felt too tight, since today fits both of the criteria, even if it was only a three-day weekend. And Makoto, he never showed up at Haru’s house today. He doesn’t come to fetch Haru often, only on the days when Haru could have skipped on purpose. Such days also fit the two criteria.

 

                Ah. The area of his seat and Makoto’s were surrounded by their classmates. _Pain, such a pain, so early in the morning._ Not exactly early, however.

 

                The whole class turned to greet him, but before doing so, their face changed from enthusiasm to disappointment, making the greeting a bit limp.

 

                “Ah, what a disappointment. We thought Nanase also joined you”

 

                “I told you, Haru isn’t in the dare. This is between me and my family on a warm and long Thursday night.” Haru heard Makoto’s voice in amongst the students. He was probably in his seat, which Haru should to, so he walked towards his seat which is located at the back of the class, besides the window.

 

                “Good morning, Haru-chan.” Makoto greeted him.

 

                “I told you to lay off the ‘–chan’, especially in scho-” Haru stopped as to see a patch of olive coloured hair on Makoto’s chin. “What happened to you?”

 

                To add up on the sight, Makoto was wearing his black-rimmed glasses. Haru’s heart skipped a beat. He looks dashing. Makoto’s face was average, the usual  Japanese boy his age. However, the way he did his hair, the goatee and the glasses, made some classmates looked at him in admiration.

 

                Makoto didn’t answer his question, he smiled to Haru, as Amakata-sensei stepped into the classroom.

                “Ara? Tachibana-kun?” Amakata-sensei, or as the class called her, Amachan, noticed Makoto while taking the attendance. She took a dramatic pause. Haru saw Makoto’s attention was on her as if he hoped that Amachan-sensei would say something that he would want to hear.

 

 “Isn’t it nice to be young.” She continued taking the attendance.

 

                Makoto dropped his head on the table in disappointment. Some of the classmates in front of him chuckled as the turned to him. He saw some of his classmates handing over some money to the other. _Did they bet on something?_ Not that he’s interested to know. _But, Makoto is involved._

 

                “Thank you, Amachan-sensei!” Someone from the front of the class said as she finished taking the attendance. “We made a bet that you would not ask Tachibana to change back to his previous image.”

 

                “I hope that your bet does not involve with money, or you will have a bad time.” Amachan-sensei warned them with her usual innocent smile. However, her tone made it sounded like a threat.

 

                “I don’t think he did much offence to the school rules. Plus, doesn’t he look better like this?” Amachan-sensei organised her papers that had been spread on the teacher’s desk before leaving.

 

                _I guess he is._

Haru caught himself staring at Makoto when he’s not looking everytime he get the chance.


	3. Like Father, Like Son

“Otousan, are you growing a beard?” asked Makoto on a Thursday evening, during dinner. The Tachibanas were on their usual dinner session just an hour after his father got home. Ran and Ren were on their usual fight for that one piece of chicken, even if there are plenty on the plate.

 

                “Whaa, Touchan’s beard is sharp.” Ren jumped out of his seat to touch his father’s chin.

 

                “I want to feel it too!” Ran also jumped out of her seat after secretly taking the piece of chicken they were fighting after into her bowl.

 

                “No way! This is a man’s thing, girls should stay there quietly”

 

                And so, their fight came to a part 2.

 

                “It’s a request from your mother. We were reminiscing the days before we got married last week, and she wanted to see the me on those days again. I figure I should start with this.”

 

                “Isn’t he handsome?” Mrs Tachibana was tidying up her workplace after cooking their dinner.

 

                _Ah, it sure is nice to be in love._ Makoto smiled, before a hand reached him with a slap.

 

                “Ah! You slapped Oniichan!” Ren cried out, making an oh-no-you-are-so-dead of a face towards Ran. “Now, oniichan will never let you play in his room again”

 

                “Gomen, Oniichan, gomen!” Ran panicked as she tried to rub the slap away from Makoto’s face.

                “Stop it you two!” Makoto sighed as he pulled the twins away from their father and made them sit. “I wonder how the two of you can live together and not tearing Okaasan’s tummy when she had you.”

 

                “Apparently, they were angels back then. Their kicks were really subtle.” Mrs Tachibana washed her hands and joined them for the dinner. She gestured Makoto for the plate in front of him. “How’s the chicken?”

 

                “New recipe? The soy sauce made it a bit salty,” says Mr Tachibana as he took seconds. Mrs Tachibana looked at how he eats and turned to look at Makoto. Apart from their hair and youth, Makoto is a split image of his father. In some ways, he also act like his father sometimes, it was from his father that he inherited the kindness.

 

                “Nee, Makoto. How about you try and grow a beard,” says Mrs Tachibana as she was curious if Makoto would look like his father during the days.

 

“Just for this weekend.”

 

                The flashback ended with Nagisa’s hysterical laugh. And Rei was trying hard to hold back a comment. They were stretching just on the poolside.

 

                “And later, she said she loved it and wanted me to stay this way. I tried to properly deny, but she made this drama scene about how she think she may not see the day when I grow up.” Makoto slumped his shoulder. “I felt like I was going to die of guilt. I didn’t even know that side of her. But Otousan did say she was quite an actress back in the days. And he was laughing all that time.”

 

                “I thought, if the school doesn’t approve this, I could just shave it off, shake this look and be back to the old Makoto. Amachan-sensei just let me off.”

 

                “I think Makoto-senpai is beautiful” says Rei as he adjusted his glasses. “Too celebrity-esque but beautiful. Uh, maybe beautiful does not suit a boy. Handsome, yes, let’s go with that.”

 

                “Nee, Mako-chan, can I touch it?” Nagisa held out his hand to reach Makoto’s patch of hair. “Uwaa, so manly! Rei-chan, I have decided. We will start growing beards as off tomorrow.”

 

                “But, Nagisa, if I remembered exactly, you were whining just last Wednesday that you haven’t shaved in a week but still, no sign of facial hair.” Rei added.

 

                “But that was before I saw Mako-chan’s look. We could as well score high and get ourselves a high school mate.” He looks at Rei and wiggled his eyebrows as to gesture what high school boys are all about. “Na, Mako-chan, what do you think if I were to have a beard? Or a moustache. A moustache would be cooler, though.”

 

                Makoto chuckled as the two of the first years went on and on. He turned to Haru who was caught staring at him at the moment. Haru immediately threw his attention towards the pool. It looked a bit dirty. Maybe it is time for them to clean it.

 

                “What are you doing? You’re supposed to get yourselves in the pool before Coach Sasabe come. Have you finished stretching and warming up? We don’t want any accidents in the pool.” Gou came a few minutes after they stopped talking about facial hairs. “Oh, Makoto-senpai, how are you today?”

 

                “Ah, ice did do the trick. It’s not as bad as before.”

 

                “Nani, nani?” Nagisa forced himself in their small talk.

 

                “Yesterday, the twins were running around the supermarket and senpai was trying to control them, but he tripped and sort of hurt his ankle.”

 

                “Oh. Eh? You saw him yesterday?” Nagisa was still in their conversation. “No wonder you weren’t surprised by the way he looks.”

 

                “I noticed it yesterday, when oniichan and I went for a little shopping and bonding time. Although, he had a thin moustache yesterday. Good call shaving it off. The moustache is funny.”

 

                “Ah, Mako-chan! I want to see Mako-chan with a moustache.”

 

                Haru rolled his eyes and dive into the cooling water. He felt hot. He felt like he was burning, and this made him dive deep into the water to cool it off.

 

                “Nee, Mako-chan, _can I touch it?”_

_“Makoto-senpai, are you okay?”_

_“I think Makoto-senpai is beautiful.”_

Haru felt irritated.


	4. Deep Water

Just before the pool floor, he let himself adrift, following the waves and the small currents of the pool. The water surrounding him were cool enough to make his skin cool biologically, but not enough to make him feel cool. He still feel the burning sensation just before he dived in. He couldn’t help but wonder, why was he irritated by those three first years? As if they weren’t annoyingly loud sometimes, yet he couldn’t make out why now.

 

                _Makoto? What about him?_ He asked himself as his mind suddenly made a flash of his bestfriend.

 

                Suddenly, he felt a grip on his arm, pulling him out of the water.

 

                Irritated, he breathed in a first gasp of air and asked,  “What?”

 

                Everyone above the water gave a sigh and smiled to each other. It was Makoto who grabbed on to him, and pulled him out. He wasn’t exactly relieved, his heart was still pounding in his chest.

 

                “You were in for quite sometimes. I was worried,” said Makoto.

 

                “Well, you didn’t have to. I was- I was thinking. And it was hot outside,” Haru pulled his arm out of Makoto’s grip. Suddenly, he vision blurred and made his legs wobble and was struggling to stand, which made him fall onto Makoto’s chest. Maybe he was in for too long after all.

 

At that moment, he was close enough to hear Makoto’s heartbeat. It was in steady beat, and not as weak as that time in the storm. He was used to Makoto having a very fast heartbeat, which happened numerous times on a movie night, where Nagisa picked a horror movie. But this was different; somehow, the steady rhythm is soothing. However, when he looked up and saw the jaw of the beholder, his own heartbeat got faster. He tried pulling away from Makoto, but didn’t have the strength to do so. He felt his body warmed up again. It made him felt uncomfortable. His heartbeat, now was too fast, made him panicked. It shouldn’t be so fast and loud. This is Makoto, not a horror movie.

 

Haru then remembered the sensation, he had felt it on his first encounter with the waterfall. The one he put it as his first love. Now, it’s for Makoto.

_No! It is Makoto, my bestfriend._

 

Haru pushed Makoto before he climbed up the pool and went to the locker room.

 

They all looked at Makoto in curiousity. Makoto just gave them his usual assuring smile.

 

“I guess he got mad at me for pulling him up.” Makoto said that to not make his friends worry.

 

“But, Mako-chan, if you haven’t pulled him up, he would drown. He was wobbly before.” Nagisa tug back Makoto’s statement as if to show that they knew something was wrong.

 

“There are some people whose lung capacity was large enough to contain air so that they can stay underwater for so long, but the case are very rare. And I don’t think Haruka-senpai is one of them.” Rei added. “Is he okay?”

 

“Alright! Let’s do this!” Coach Sasabe came with his loud and wild spirit. The Iwatobi Swim Club could’ve sworn that they saw some hues from the side of his side fringe. “Makoto! Is that a goatee? My, my, you look good with that. Eh? Where’s Haruka?”

 

“I’ll go get him” Nagisa stood up with his hands raised before racing to the locker room.

 

“Haru-chan. Oh Haru-” Nagisa spotted Haru who was sitting in a corner of their locker room. Haru looked up before gazing back aimlessly as he did before “Are you okay, Haru-chan? What you did just now was very rude. Poor Mako-chan, he only wanted to help you. He thought you were drowning. He thought you were mad at him for pulling you out.”

 

“I’m not.”

 

“To be honest, I was jealous.” Haru was shocked and turned to Nagisa who was trying to hide his face. “The two of you. Of how close you are.”

“Whatever it is, it will always be, ‘I wonder if Haru…’ here, ‘What will Haru…’ there all the time with Mako-chan. It’s not always about you.” Nagisa continued.

 

Haru’s concern on Nagisa grew. _What is he trying to say?_

“Nee, Haru-chan, what do you think of Makoto, besides him being wishy-washy? You’ve been with him for too long, you must’ve known a lot about him.”

 

“Nagisa, Haru, Coach Sasabe’s patience is running low, we should hurry!” called out Makoto


	5. Immunity

“Haru-chan! Have you seen Mako-chan?” Nagisa asked Haruka one day during lunch. “And no, he’s not on the roof, I checked. And Rei-chan have got some errands. It’s kind of lonely, not that I haven’t have any other friends other than the swim club. But-”

 

_Man, this guy is even noisier than Makoto. If I’m lucky enough, I might find the switch somewhere on him._

As they walked past the field area, he saw Makoto at a nearby bench across them. But, he wasn’t alone. Gou is with him. Haruka stopped to look at them and let Nagisa continue walking.

 

Makoto and Gou were talking about something and it was kind of intimate. He saw Gou blushed every now and then. And he saw Makoto, showering Gou with his usual affection and concern. Makoto can’t seem to stop smiling while he talks.

 

“Haru-chan!” Seems like Nagisa had caught up, and ran towards him. “Nani, nani?”

 

Haruka looked at Nagisa to see his reaction towards the scene. He thought about what Nagisa said on that day, and he thought maybe Nagisa too felt the same way about Makoto as he is. But, he wasn’t very sure, since Nagisa always seem to clung onto him. However, as of lately, Nagisa haven’t been bugging him, and sometimes, Nagisa said something sarcastic and is directed towards him.

 

“Ah, Gou!,” Nagisa peered through the neatly trimmed bushes. “Ne, Haru-chan, what do you think? I mean, let’s guess what they are saying.”

 

“Who cares?” Haruka turned to leave them, he’s hungry and Makoto dragged him to school earlier than usual this morning, made him skip breakfast. “Let’s go Nagisa, I need my mackerel.”

 

“But, Haru-chan… Aren’t you irritated?”

 

“Why?”

 

“Nothing! Just- um… Mako-chan is straight, isn’t he?”

 

Haruka raised an eyebrow, Nagisa was very weird lately. And if his hypothesis is correct, he wanted proof. He didn’t know how to make Nagisa spill, but he wanted to know.

 

“Who knows.”

 

“Does that mean, I won’t have a chance with him?”

 

Haruka felt a sting in his chest and up at his nose. He got the proof that he wanted. However, Nagisa’s statement speaks for him as well. Not that he wanted anything more than the attention he gets from Makoto, but the idea of Makoto has other people to hang out with, other people to prioritize. Who knows where Haruka will end up in his new list, somewhere in the future. It felt wrong, it was out of norm. Norm is when there is Haruka, there is Makoto. It had been like that for so long.

 

“Nagisa, are you-”

 

“You caught me, Haru-chan. Seems like I have a crush on our captain.”

 

Haruka gulped, it was weird in so many ways, especially seeing Nagisa making an expression far from his usual bubbly self. He was serious, he was desperate. Always have the social skills of a statue, Haruka didn’t know how to react to Nagisa’s confession.

 

“I can’t help it. It was his kindness. I know, this is Mako-chan, we’re talking about. He is nice to everyone. But his kindness and his smile, somehow, made me selfish and want him to myself. I don’t know how to explain this. I’m so screwed!” Nagisa squatted, hands in his hair. “I’m confused. He is my friend, my senpai. And I am sure I am not attracted to guys. But he-”

 

“I thought I was wrong, so I tried acting normal. But, his gestures towards me made me flushed and nervous, and that feeling came back. During my stay at his place, I can’t help but noting all these small things he do.”

 

Nagisa recalled the night he slept at Makoto’s. He slept on the futon and Makoto was on his bed. He couldn’t sleep well. And sometimes, Makoto’s hand hung over him while he sleeps. Nagisa would reach and squeeze the large and warm hand. He felt relieved by doing so. But he felt that it was weird of him to do so.

 

“Ne, Haru-chan, how did you do it?”

 

“Do what?”

 

“Your immunity towards Makoto’s kindness and smile. I’ve seen you two. When Makoto went big brother on you, sometimes a mother, yet, you were not moved. I want that. I don’t want to be moved by his actions, I can’t.”

 

Haruka think deeply. _Immune to what now?_

 

_I don’t think I’m immune to that anymore._


	6. Brother To Brother

After school, Haruka rushed towards the pool. Too much trigonometry, too much logic made his head heavy. And for some reason, he was sure that he would sink with all the load in his brain.

 

“Haru, wait up!” Makoto chased him some distant away. “Please don’t jump into the pool just yet. You need to rinse first. Nagisa!”

 

Nagisa seemed shocked at the call, he was only on his way to the pool, absent-mindedly. He was ahead of them. “Mako-chan.”

 

“What’s wrong, Nagisa?” Makoto stopped before Nagisa. “Is it about the test?”

 

“I… I- Umm..No, but-”

 

Haruka stopped and looked back to Nagisa and Makoto. He knew that Nagisa’s feeling was overflowing at that moment. Nagisa’s confession made it clear that he was lovesick, but, he had to hold back. He cherished their friendship so much that he had to hold back. And Makoto being straight, with Gou and all. Nagisa seek Haruka’s help into overcoming his crush towards Makoto, what he didn’t know, they were both in the same state. Haruka thought that Nagisa’s plead may help him get out of the awkward thing he had for Makoto. Haruka tried to call Nagisa.

 

“Rinrin!” Nagisa exclaimed as he saw a certain red head with sharp teeth wearing the white Samezuka Academy uniform.

 

“Yo!”

 

“Rin, what are you- Hey!” Makoto couldn’t finish his sentence when he was pulled away by Rin by his forearm.

 

“You, come with me.” Rin looked irritated.

“Rinrin, where are you-”

 

“Adult’s business. You children go play in the pool while me and him settle a few things. And no, Nagisa, no I’m not going to join you, if that’s what you are thinking now.”

 

“Well, I was also thinking- Ow!” Makoto tried to add something before he was cut out by Rin and dragged away from the gang.

 

“No, I’m not joining you, even if I am free right now.”

 

“You guys go ahead, go warm up! That includes you Haru! Warm up, not dive in!”

 

“Jeez, what’s his problem?” Rei stopped by. He was also on his way to the pool when he saw Rin dragging their captain away.

 

“Let’s go!” Haru called out to Nagisa and Rei.

 

As the three of them walked, they saw Rin and Makoto at some distance. Rin was holding Makoto’s chin and lean in closer while talking. That’s all they can make out from the distant. Right now, Haruka and Nagisa were in sync. Whatever Haruka felt, Nagisa might felt it too.

 

“Ah!” Rei exclaimed. “They weren’t doing what I think they did, didn’t they? I didn’t know Makoto-senpai swings that way. And with Rin-san? Or maybe not, according to that distant, it can’t be.”

 

“Adult stuff, huh? They could just go die, for all that I care.” Nagisa walked faster than later ran towards the locker room.

 

“What did I say?” Dumbfounded, Rei asked.

 

Haruka shrugged and leave Rei alone to reflect. Honestly, anyone would feel guilty or sympathy, when Nagisa showed a face that is far from his bubbly expression. With words like that, Rei knew he did a big fault.

 

“Nagisa..?”

 

Nagisa made sure his new swimming suit fit nicely before turning to Haruka and Rei. “Nee, what do you think?”

 

“It lacks something,” Rei adjusted his prescribed goggles and saw Haruka’s irritated expression. “Umm, sorry, Nagisa-kun. If I had offended you in anyway, just now.”

 

“Meh, nothing to worry! I didn’t even realised I said all those things,” Nagisa gave an assuring smile. He wasn’t exactly the type to be mad easily to begin with. However, it is complicated when it comes to Makoto. “I didn’t mean any of it. Race you to the pool!”

 

“Nagisa-kun, you heard what Makoto-senpai said!” Rei tried to stop Nagisa but it was too late, water splashed and Gou was in the way and she got hit with some of the splash.

 

“Nagisa, you!” Gou cried.

 

Haruka was going to dive in as well, the water looked gorgeous at this time of the day. It was as if hypnotising Haruka to dive in as well. But before he could move one more step, he immediately took one step back and bend himself to the right.

 

“Well, let’s get started-” Makoto called out after changing into his swimsuit. “Nagisa?!”

 

“I tried to stop him. I told him you wanted us to stretch first.” Haruka tattled nonchalantly.

 

“What?!”

 

“No, you weren’t! You almost jump along with him.” Rei added.

 

“But I didn’t.”

 

Makoto sighed with his usual smile and  put his thumb and index finger on his temple. He turned to Gou, “We’re busted.”

 

“Uh-oh. What did he said?”

 

“Well, he misunderstood at first, and threatened me instead.”

 

“Did you tell him, then?”

 

“Umm… I think I did, but I’m not sure if he gets the message.”

 

“He doesn’t need to know the details, you know. Oh, I’m so dead.”

 

After practice, the swim team are allowed to linger around the pool up until 5.45pm. Usually, Haruka is the only one still in the pool. But today, he was accompanied by Nagisa.

 

“Nee, Haru-chan. Now I know why you love the water,” Nagisa waddled a bit in the water. “I feel so calm in the water. It is as if it takes my problems away.”

 

“That’s not solely what it does, and by the way, you mis-used it. You should not burden the water with your problems.  Now, get out of the water.”

 

“Eeeeeehhhh! How come!” Nagisa cried out. “If only I have a crush on water instead of Mako-chan.”

 

“Mako-chan what? I heard my name being said.” Makoto called out from the side of the pool. He was already dressed in the school uniform, ready to go home.

 

Nagisa dived in deeper to get rid of the heat that crawled up on his face. He wished from the bottom of his heart that Makoto didn’t hear a word he said before. When he resurfaced, Makoto’s hand extended towards him. Haruka was already out of the water. He took a deep breath and took Makoto’s hand.

 

“Alley-oop!” Makoto pulled Nagisa out of the water with much ease. For a second, he thought he was floating in mid-air as Makoto pulled him out of the water onto the side of the pool. Nagisa is light and Makoto is strong, maybe Makoto did lift Nagisa before landing him on the side of the pool. “Ah, I forgot to ask. How did the test go?”

 

Nagisa was in conflict. It was as awkward as it is being next to Makoto. Perhaps it would be weirder for him to be quiet. “You are awesome, Mako-chan. I got an A”

 

Makoto looked delighted. He smiled and put his hand on Nagisa’s head. Makoto ruffled Nagisa’s light blond hair in approval. He was proud of him. Haruka could see that Nagisa is uncomfortable and his face reddened. Nagisa pushed Makoto’s hand away before running towards the shower.

 

“What was that all about?” Makoto looked at Haruka, confused, but still smiling.

 

“Makoto no baka.”

 

“Eeeehh!!”

 

“Be sure to check the mirror, when you get home. I thought I saw nose hair sticking out.”

 

“Haru!”

 

 _I should stick to just loving the water._ Haruka smiled. 


	7. I missed Rin

The next day, which is Friday, Rin came over to Iwatobi High School. Apparently, Makoto had said a few things during their ‘adult talk’ and made Rin came to coach Rei’s butterfly stroke. Rin came in late, when he came, he hurriedly pulled Makoto out of the pool and towards the field.

 

“What’s up with that guy? Why is he here?” Rei waddled in the pool before getting back up to the platform to practice on his dive.

 

Nagisa did a little bit of backstroke to his starting point. “Gou, time me! I want to see how I do without the dive.”

 

“It’s Kou. Call me Kou! I won’t time you if you do that again.”

 

“Why should I? Your parents named you that. Who am I to go against their plan on growing a daughter with the name Gou?” Nagisa adjusted his goggles, making it secure before he sped off. “You should embrace your name, like I did with Nagisa. Like how we all embrace our names. Maybe not Haru-chan, though. That’s why we’re calling him Haru-chan.”

 

“Go!”

 

“Yeah, Gou! That’s right.”

 

“No, I mean, go! I already started the stopwatch!”

 

“Oh! Reset! Reset!”

 

“Gou.” Rin called to his sister, gesturing her to come over to him and Makoto not far from where Gou is standing.

 

Nagisa glared at Rin, which made Rin startled. He never got that kind of look from Nagisa before, even when he ignored or made Nagisa mad back in the days, he would just either sulk or pout. Nagisa sped away in an instant after the glare.

 

“Alright, Boomerang Megane! Show me what you got. You must’ve improved a bit after the tournament,” Rin stepped into the pool after changing to his swimsuit.

 

“Boomerang Megane? The name is Ryugazaki Rei, thank you very much,”  Rei dived from the platform and starting to flap his “wing” underwater as Rin watched.

 

“Not bad, but as analytical as you may seem, you’re still far away from the actual form. I might be wrong, but you did try to imitate a real butterfly.”

 

Rei blushed. He did admire the butterfly he watched with Haruka that day. “Real butterflies are beautiful.”

 

“Yeah, that’s true. But when competing, you can’t just rely on form. You must also know the concept of it and the modification to meet the situation,” Suddenly Rin went into teacher mode. It was funny considering how Rin actually is.

 

“180.” Exclaimed Gou as she watched from afar. She was referring to her brother’s personality, which turned 180 degrees. Makoto was right beside her and Nagisa was in front of them, in the pool.

 

“Yeah, 180 indeed,” Makoto agreed. “But, when he’s like that, we could actually see his passion when it comes to swimming. Maybe he wasn’t chasing your father’s dreams after all. At least,  not entirely.”

 

Haru gave Rin an analytical observation. _This guy is really passionate about swimming after all._ All this time, he thought Rin was only a competitive person and always wanted to be the best. That’s why he despised Rin at first. He thought Rin does not appreciate water yet the water just let him move freely and fast, which does not obey Haruka’s theory when they were little.

 

“Makoto, what’re you doing up there. I’m dying to see some Makoto’s rough backstroke,” Rin called out Makoto who was still on the bench beside the pool.

 

Makoto and Rin were kind of close, ever since elementary school. It is undeniable that Makoto has the ability to break someone’s wall. Maybe Rin’s protective wall had been broken by him, making him and Rin the same as before. Unlike Nagisa, who only climbed the wall, Rin wasn’t very welcome with Nagisa’s forced socials. Rei, being a newbie that he was and Haru, whose social skills almost non-existent, Rin wasn’t familiar with them as he was with Makoto.

 

“As hot as you are with a goatee, I don’t think it’ll work with swimming. Water resistant.”

 

“Speak for yourself. Do something about the hair, it’s getting longer.”

 

“Ooh, Makoto’s got groove. He actually made a comeback. Yeah, I’ll do something about this. In the meantime, this cap ought to do the trick.” Rin pulled the back of his cap and make it snap like he always do.

 

Makoto smirked and pulled some strand of hair that escaped Rin’s cap causing the other male gritted his teeth in pain and anger.

 

As Rin tutored Rei, he watches the members of Iwatobi High School swim team doing their routine. Haruka did his best and beat Rin’s time record at Samezuka by 2 milliseconds. Rin’s competitive instinct rose in an instant and challenged Haruka again.

 

“Nee, Rinrin! How about me? Let’s race, I can do butterfly,” Nagisa made his way into the tension Rin made between him and Haruka.

 

“You mean the grasshopper?”

 

“My what?”

 

“Your butterfly stroke. It looks more like a grasshopper stroke. I wouldn’t say that when we were kids, because I _know_ you would cry if I say so.”

 

“That’s just mean, Rinrin-chan. I wouldn’t cry like you did when you lost to Haru-chan”

 

“What? How did you kno- wait! What did you just call me, pipsqueak? ”

 

“Rinrin-chan. The crybaby!”

 

Rin growled, he was desperate to see blood. Nagisa’s blood, the devil living in a body of a shota. He then look at Makoto who made a no-you-won’t look.  “Fine, we’ll race. Your breast stroke with my butterfly.”

 

“Is that fair?” Gou asked Haruka who was on the platform, ready to dive. Haruka looked back at her “It’s Rin and Nagisa. They appeared like cats and dogs, but they were natural when it comes to doing ridiculous stuff.”

 

As Haruka dived, Gou shrugged, brushing off the nonsensical statement that her senpai gave.

 

“Megane, watch and learn!”

 

Makoto extended his hand towards Haruka as he finished his lap. “It’s pretty lively when those two are around.”

 

“Lively as in noisy,” Haruka reached out for Makoto’s hand. He always admired Makoto’s strength when he pulled him up out of the water.

 

“Who knew, Rin could be so cute. I missed him.”

 

Haruka was a bit surprised by Makoto’s statement. He looked at Makoto, who was watching Rin from afar, who was arguing with Nagisa on who touched the side of the pool first.

 

“Did it sound weird?”

 

Haruka looked away. When the usual Makoto did the upturned eyebrow and smile, he was Makoto. But, this Makoto is attractive. How can a goatee made someone looks different than he is? Haruka felt his heart skipped a few beats and wished that the time stopped when he was looking at Makoto, who glimmered in the shades of the sunset.

 

“Nee, Haru.” Makoto called out.

 

“What?”

 

“Do you know how to reject love confessions?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The fic was already on fanfiction.net. But, I thought about uploading here on AO3... I've already had like 7 chapters on FF... So, I'm sorry for putting up 7 chapters on one go


	8. Pick One

“Haru, come on. Help me out here,” Makoto begged Haruka on their way home. Since they walked home together with Nagisa, Rei and Rin, Makoto whispered to him. Gou, somehow had made her way home since she had some arrangements with her friend Chigusa earlier.

 

Haru gave him an annoyed look. “I told you, just ignore it.”

 

“But I can’t just ignore it. That’s mean.” Makoto accidentally raised his voice.

 

“Nani, nani?” Nagisa butted them.

 

“Makoto needed advice. Tell them, Makoto.” Haru answered.

 

Makoto blushed. He didn’t meant to let the others know since he thought that it was embarrassing. “I-it was nothing.”

 

“I heard you guys talking back then,” Rin voiced out. He was out in front of the pack, giving additional advice to his mentee. “You were asking him how to turned down girls, weren’t you?”

 

Rei adjusted his spectacles. “I guess this is due to Makoto-senpai’s new looks. With him being the captain and our club being acknowledged. Most probably, some girls saw senpai in a swimsuit action.”

 

“B-Before… Well, before this, I never had one. Now, whenever I’m free, girls will approach me. Even before class started, I already had two letters in my shoe locker.”

 

“What’s so hard about this? Tell them you’re not interested, Mako-chan.”

 

Haruka looked at Nagisa whenever he interacted with Makoto. Ever since he knew Nagisa had a crush on Makoto. Nagisa said that he’s uncomfortable around Makoto. Even though Haruka doesn’t really care, but he knew how it felt.

 

_I guess, he’s getting better._

 

“Makoto, have you ever wanted a girlfriend?” Rin asked.

 

Nagisa and Haru’s faces changed. They were curious and at the same time scared of Makoto’s answer.

 

“Well, for the time being, I don’t think it’s appropriate. I’ll be busy with club activities and my studies. I just want to swim wi-”

 

“Yeah, but do you want one?” Rin asked again.

 

Makoto blushed and hung his head low, throwing his gaze away from his friends.

 

“Then, just pick one that you liked the most. That way, you’ll be free from the confessions.” Rin just shot his suggestion nonchalantly. “But, don’t you ever go near my sister.”

 

“I told you, it’s the Tachibana from the baseball club!”

 

“I know, but you’re pretty chummy with her. I’m afraid you might, well- Just that, she can be adorable when you get to know her so, I’m afraid- Well, my sister is off limits, get it!”

 

Nagisa laughed. “Nee, Rinrin-chan’s not only a crybaby, he’s also a sis-con?”

 

“Nagisa, have you heard about the blond boy who had this big mouth, and one day, he was found dead at the park, drowned in a fountain?”

 

“Yeah, I’ve heard. But unfortunately for the killer, the kid can swim and can control his breathing. And he reported the shark-teethed killer to the police. Plus, he wet-willied the killer.” Nagisa placed his drooled finger into Rin’s ear and make a run for it.

 

“One day, Nagisa! One day! How about a painful death of being pushed off the railway?”

 

Makoto and Rei laughed. Rei told that he was glad having Rin around since Nagisa would bother Rin and leave him alone.

 

“But, I can’t pick one of them. It won’t feel right.”

 

“Then, how about Haru here. You guys acted all like an old married couple.” Rin suggested.

 

“What?!” All four of the Iwatobi High boys exclaimed.

 

“Wait, no!”

 

Haru felt hurt.

 

“Then, what about this blond-do-have-more-fun?” Rin finally caught Nagisa in a chokehold. “Or, Megane? You guys are close.”

 

“No! Why do you even suggest this?” Makoto’s face can’t get anymore red than the shade he was in right now.

 

Rei’s heart almost burst out of his chest when Rin suggested his name. Nagisa’s face changed. He stopped struggling in Rin’s arms.

 

“It sounded so wrong!” Rei raised his voice while his face reddens. “Love relationship between two men sounded… Err.. Not that it’s not beautiful, but, it’s out of the norm.”

 

“Eh? I don’t think it’s unusual. I think I am one.”

 

“With Nitori?”All of the boys asked.

 

“What? No! That guy is as straight as a street lamp pole. His taste in porn, however…” Rin shrugged as he tried to deny the scene in their room the other day.

 

“You’re not helping! I just want to know how to turn down a girl’s confession. You know, the one they gather every nerves and guts to let it reach me. It helps if you give me suggestions that would not frustrate them in anyway. No! I’m not picking the girls or lie to them about me having a girlfriend. Or a boyfriend.” Makoto snapped.

 

“You just don’t understand. I don’t want to hurt anyone. And I’m not dating any one of my **friends**. You guys are my brotherhood. Nobody can ever replace you guys and I don’t want us to change,” Makoto lowered his voice as if regretting any of his reaction earlier. He put his long and sturdy arms around everyone. “Nagisa, are you okay?”

 

Tears streamed down Nagisa’s face. He himself were surprised of it. “I… I- umm. I’m touched, Mako-chan.” Nagisa tried wiping his tears dry, but the tears kept flowing.

 

“Look, who is the crybaby now?” Rin teased, a sense of revenge came down his throat.

 

But Rin found himself welling up tears as he saw Nagisa’s. He then figured it out.

 

“Nee, Rei-chan? Let’s just go home.”

 

“But, Nagisa-kun, I thought you were hungry. We’re almost at the pizza place.”

 

“Nagisa” Rin could have sworn he saw concern in Haru’s eyes as he called Nagisa. He needed confirmation.

 

“Never mind. I’ll just go home. I suddenly remembered that I have a homework due tomorrow! Bye, guys.” Nagisa then ran off towards the road to the station.

 

“I’ll better go with him.” Rei followed suit. “Nagisa-kun! Wait for me!”

 

“I’m worried about Nagisa. He’s very weird lately. He talked less than always.”

 

“Only when you’re around.” Haru added.

 

“Oh my. Did I offended him in anyway? I guess I can be too strict while tutoring him. I hope he’s not scared of me.”

 

“Unlike you, Nagisa’s not scare of anything. Makoto no baka.” Rin finally concluded.

 

_Nagisa likes Makoto._


	9. Rin?

                Makoto rolled around on his bed, trying to settle himself before going to bed. The lights in his room was off. He picked up his phone and looked over the contacts, searching for a name.

 

                _It’s not too late, right? I’ll call him once, if he didn’t pick up the phone then, he’s asleep. So, I don’t have to call him again._

                He called and wait patiently for the receiver to pick up.

 

                “Ah, hello, Mako-chan. What’s up?” Nagisa sounded occupied. Or maybe his mouth is.

 

                “I’m just calling to see if you’re o- Are you eating?”

 

                “I’m really hungry.”

 

                “Nagisa, it’s bad for you to eat late, especially at this hour.”

 

                “…” Which can be translated by ‘Omnomnom’ was heard at the end of the line.

 

                “Are you okay?”

 

                “Yeah, I’m fine.”

 

                “But, you were tearing and then rushing home. Is there anything wrong?”

 

                “…”

 

                “You can always trust me… But, it’s okay if you don’t want to tell me. It’s just that, I- Um, I don’t know how to- I mean, you were always happy all the time, even if someone offended you. You would just smile and get back at them later. Though, your methods are pure evil.” Makoto sighed before continuing his conversation. “The way you acted just now, it’s different. So, I didn’t know how to react to it. Especially, when you just turn down your favourite ‘Pizza Time’.”

 

                “Nah, don’t worry, Mako-chan. I guess I haven’t eaten right. I got a really bad stomach ache and it was so horrible. Made me cry and miss my ‘Pizza Time’!” Nagisa pouted. “Probably from all the sweets I ate before.”

 

                “Nagisa, you know that too much sweets are bad for you. Now, let it be a lesson for you to not indulge in too much sweets before-”

 

“Yeah, yeah. I know! Nee, Mako-chan, can I see you tomorrow?”

 

* * *

 

 

                Nagisa waited patiently behind a building of the school. He was nervous. He thought about it over and over again. He recalled yesterday.

 

                “There you are! Oi, demon chibi!” Rin called out as he spotted the blond wandering around after he left the bunch.

 

                “What?” Nagisa was slightly irritated.

 

                “Oooh, scary! Just like an angry kitty. Come on!” Rin pulled him onto a nearby bench.

 

                “What is up with you? Wait, you are going to strangle me and dump my body into the nearby bushes, aren’t you?”

 

                “Nah, I can do that later. What’s up with you?”

 

                “None of your concern.”

 

                “It’s Makoto, isn’t it?”

 

                Nagisa felt heat crept up on his face and made a silly dance that made him quite ticklish on his nose. Rin nailed it, but Nagisa was quite unsure of whether to give in or just ignore him. Rin is not Haru, whom he can speak of it freely. Or maybe he could, Rin did came out of his closet a while ago. Nagisa felt tears welling up in his eyes, he was reminded of the exact words Makoto said before. Not that he was expecting Makoto to say anything in particular, but somehow, it felt hurt when the other party never ever gave it a thought and was totally rejecting.

 

                “He rejected us all, did he?” Rin lean aback a little while gazing an abnormally bright star. It might be a satellite, but it was big and bright. “I wasn’t expecting that answer at all.”

 

                “What are you saying, Rinrin?”

 

                “Ah, if Makoto can read minds, I’m the one who can read feelings. I can see right through you. Correct me if I’m wrong, but you like Makoto, didn’t you?”

 

                “… Please don’t judge me.”

 

                “Like I’m the one to talk.”

               

                “Why do you care all of a sudden?” Nagisa stared at Rin while he gaze at the night sky. It was confusing, what Rin was doing right now. _He actually cared?_

 

                “Wow, you sure bite the hand that was trying to feed you. Maybe it’s because of my brotherly instincts, even if I haven’t been a big brother to a little brother before, to Nitori, maybe. But most of all, it’s because we’re the same.”

 

                “Same?”

 

                “I was hurt too when Makoto said that. And maybe Haru as well. And megane, I mean, Rei, but he’s a mild case.”

 

                “Haru-chan?” Nagisa wasn’t expecting Haruka too felt the same way that he is towards Makoto. “But Haru-chan’s immune-”

 

                “Oh, but he’s not. I bet he’s having a much harder time. Makoto is always babying him. That guy just doesn’t have any clue of how he affects people.”

 

                “Mako-chan is too nice. His affection towards others, is like a magnetic effect. His gestures, his courtesy, his brotherly nature-” Nagisa paused, he got carried away by describing Makoto’s strong points that had smite him.

 

                “Yeah. And when he’s in big brother mode, he could go all the way.” Rin chuckled. “I mean, even towards me. And I’m already a big brother, which I have longer experience of and I’m older!”

 

                Nagisa laughed. Rin was the type of a big brother that respects personal space and protective but at times overdoing it. But he was the type who would let those below him to learn and experience on their own, whereas Makoto was the brother that is loving, and caring but didn’t know how to let things be, in this case, independence of the siblings below him. Sometimes he saw Makoto and Rin went neck-to-neck on their opinions on people, especially when it comes to discussing their roles as big brother. Makoto was always the one surrender, but at times he could give a good argument on a matter.

 

                Rin stood up and was on his way back. “Nagisa, there’s no harm in letting him know. But, be sure to be ready for whatever answer he was going to give, and willing to continue to be his friend, because that’s the main reason if things didn’t go well.”

 

                “At least, that’s what I planned to do.” Rin said before running into the dark of the night.

 

                “I wonder where Rei-chan went.”

 

                _There he is._

 

Nagisa snapped out of his flashback as he saw Makoto approaching him.

 

                _It’s now or never._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter sure was chatty...Oh, I just gave Rin superpowers!!Haha, just kidding. Some people can do that


	10. Confession

Haruka walked into the classroom on the next day. There was a crowd again at Makoto’s seat.

 

 _Maybe he had dreadlocks this time. Out of my seat, please._ Haru glared at Jun-san who was sitting on his seat. Before he sits, Haru catch a glimpse of Makoto.

 

“What happened to you?” he asked.

 

Makoto was back to himself. No more goatee, no more stylish hairstyle, just like he was before, except the glasses. “Good morning to you too.” Makoto gave him the smile. He no longer looks like he was seducing anyone.

 

“Tachibana-kun, come on, it’s a shame. You really looked good.”

 

“Thanks, Tezuka-san, I’m flattered. But I don’t feel like myself when I looked like that. It’s kind of awkward actually. I always wake up not knowing who was that in the mirror. Several times I thought it was my dad and greeted him.”

 

The crowds laughed with him. As they laughed, Takashi grabbed Makoto by the shoulder. “At least us boys won’t have to feel insecure whenever you are around anymore, ah? Hey, you got Mimi-chan’s confession yesterday, right? Mind if you-”

 

The door slid open and Amakata-sensei walked in. The crowd hurriedly walked towards their seats.

 

_And here I thought the factor that attracts me towards that guy is his looks. Why am I still feeling it?_

Haruka’s heart continues to pound underneath his chest when Makoto smiled at him before gesturing him to focus in class. At times, he would reminisce the times he used to spend with Makoto when they were little. He was actually looking for a reason why he was hurt when Makoto rejected him. He knew he likes Makoto, but what he wanted to know is since when, and how. Maybe it started off last few days when Makoto changed his looks and capture everyone’s hearts including himself and Nagisa. But if so, that must have meant that he fall for his model-like looks and not Makoto himself.

 

After swimming practice, Haru waited for Makoto. It wasn’t really a routine. Haru actually think that it’s a bother, but Makoto always waits for him before heading home, that it would be weird to not to wait for him.

 

_He’s late. For once. I wonder if I can still go for a swim before he came._

“Haru?” Makoto called in disbelief. “I thought you said that it’s a bother to go home with me often.”

 

_This guy. Really!_

“If you know that, why are you always waiting for me,” Haru walked ahead.

 

Makoto chuckled. “I had to lock the entrance to the pool, you were always the last one to leave. Plus, it’d be lonely to walk home alone. And we are heading the same way.”

 

“Haru, mind me asking. Is that a new scarf?” Makoto pointed to the scarf in Haruka’s bag. It was long and was dragging on the floor.

 

“Ah, I met a strange couple of boys on the way to school. They were about our age. One is a blond and another have a very lame bowl cut. The bowl cut guy was wearing this scarf and has his fingers stuck under the blond’s arm. The blond was squirming as they fought and he threw this scarf.”

 

“Who would wear a scarf on this weather?” Makoto made a worried face. “Maybe he’s sick. You ought to return it back when you picked it this morning.”

 

“I would, but they were a distant away from me, and it’s a bother to call out to them.” Haruka pulled it out and handed it to Makoto. “You return it.”

 

“But I haven’t seen them before. Are they from our school?”

 

“Highly unlikely. That lame bowl cut, haven’t seen him anywhere near our school. Plus, he sounded a lot like you. Perverted though. Maybe it’s easier for you to find him.”

 

“What kind of logic is that?”

 

As they were about to walk down to the street where Makoto lives, Haruka voiced out. “You’ve been quiet.”

 

Makoto was not even paying attention. His mind wandered off.

 

“Makoto!”

 

“Yes. What?”

 

“You’re awfully quiet today.”

 

“Am I?” Makoto rubbed his neck. Clearly he has something on his mind.

 

“Anything you want to talk about?”

 

“None in particular.”

 

Haruka knows best when something was on Makoto’s mind, and if he had some kind of trouble, he wouldn’t say it, even to his own best friend. Makoto is the guy that will solve whatever that’s been bothering him before telling it to anyone. Makoto’s mother once told him that Makoto worries a lot, and he didn’t want anyone he knew feels the same way. He’s not the one to be soothed by others. And he was never the guy to express his discomfort. Usually, when something bad happens, he would take it in, comfort himself and rationalize before letting anyone know. And his mother wants Haruka to help his teenage son.

 

“Does it have anything to do with why you are late?”

 

“More or less.”

 

“Well, I’ll listen.” For once Haruka actually wanted to know what’s bothering Makoto.

 

“Okay.”

 

Haruka waited for Makoto’s long reply, but it never came. He knew Makoto wasn’t ready to tell him. As they reached Makoto’s house, Makoto turned to him and hold his shoulder, “Thanks for waiting.” But his face translated, ‘I’m sorry, but I’ll tell you someday.’

 

When Haruka reached home, his cellphone was blinking, indicating a new message.

 

“Haru-chan, sorry for being insensitive, I didn’t know you like Mako-chan too. I’ll confess to Mako-chan. You should too.” – Nagisa. Sent 5.45pm today.

 

Haruka couldn’t help but blush when blunt words of “…I didn’t know you like Mako-chan too…” appeared and read by his own mind. It was too blunt but it was the truth.

 

_What am I to do? Should I?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't know what happened in this chapter.... I'm just nervous since the Finals are here


	11. Makoto

                “Nee, Haru.” Makoto called Haruka as they were playing videogames on a Saturday night. “Have you ever regretted something?”

 

                Haruka immediately pause the game. He doesn’t usually do that, but he has seen Makoto the other day and a few days after that. He may have grown concern since his best friend seems out of it for quite sometimes.

 

                “You’d rather keep the scarf instead of returning it to the local police?”

 

                Makoto chuckled, as Haruka tried to crack a joke. Even if he has some humour in him, his face is not connected to those. Makoto felt guilty for laughing at Haruka’s expression that complement his jokes, instead of laughing at his joke. Haruka sighed of relief, he wasn’t very comfortable sitting in a room with a bothered Makoto.

 

                “What is it about?” Haruka faced him, prepared to listen intently.

 

                “Never mind. It’s not anything serious,” Makoto shrugged and press the play button from Haruka’s console. Haruka paused it once again, immediately.

 

                “What is it about?” Haruka asked again.

 

                “I said something that unintendedly hurt someone. I wish I could take those words back.” Makoto pulled his spectacles and holding it playfully while figuring the words to say. He wasn’t sure if he should tell Haruka, but he blurted when he asked Haruka about ever being regretting something. At first, he wasn’t very worried, since Haruka never focused on whatever he said. But right now, he is terrified, Haruka was facing him, focused on him.

 

                _I might have fallen for you…_

                …was all what he could recall. Makoto fumbled for words so that no one will misunderstand.

 

                “Someone confessed-”

 

                “Nagisa really did it?” Haruka asked.

 

                “Eh?” Makoto was confused. It was true. He blushed, looking away. “Wh-How did you know?”

 

                Haruka ignored his question. “Is this why you are bothered?”

 

                Makoto nodded. “This makes me ponder on the words I said on that day. I said no quite too soon. And I finally figured out why Nagisa ran off after that.”

 

                “And your answer to him?”

 

                “I didn’t reply. Just like every other confession. On hold.” Makoto buried his face in his knees. “I’m starting to think that I’m the worst. I can’t even face all those people. Nagisa, even if he’s back to his old self. Didn’t even ask me anything, but, I can’t really shake it off. I mean, he’s one of us.”

 

                “You’re overthinking it way too much. You’re too nice, you know that?”

 

                “I’ve been told that quite a lot of times and half of it was from you. Really, I can’t just say no that quickly. These things are very delicate, a matter of feelings.”

 

                “And what about yours? You’re depressed now because you cared about their feelings. It’s unhealthy.”

 

                As Haruka lectured him, Makoto can only reply with “I know.”

 

                “Thanks to you, I felt tired from talking more than usual. People are not that weak. Sure, we got hurt but we can always recover and start anew. You’ve been hurt, I’ve been hurt, but we’re still alive, aren’t we? Makoto, sometimes enough is enough.”

 

                “I know.” Finally, Makoto lifted his face. “Sorry for this, but I don’t think I can do it just yet.”

 

                Haruka sighed. _I did my best._

 

                “What bothers me the most is… Rin.”

 

                Haruka immediately turned to face Makoto at the sound of his rival’s name. “What about him?”

 

                Makoto blushed and bury his face back in his knees. “Forget I said anything.”

 

                “No. You said Rin. What about him? Is it the part where he came out of the closet?”

 

                “That too,” Makoto’s voice is still muffled in his knees.

 

                “It is to be expected. And here we thought that he was a romantic.”

 

                “That’s just mean, Haru.” Makoto sighed. “I wish I didn’t say any of those things. I’ve regretted this much. Hey, when are you going to build me a time machine?”

 

                It was a clear sign that Makoto wanted to drop this conversation. His mistake was he mentioned Rin, a name that triggers Haruka’s competitive side.

 

                “I never agree to any time machine constructing project. What about Rin?”

 

                Makoto sighed. He said way too much tonight. “Rin too. He confessed to me…”

 

                _“I might have fallen for you. But don’t worry, I get your message the other day. It’s cool. We’re friend, I totally get it. And we can still be friends. I just wanted to let you know, that’s all. If I do this, I can move on. Sorry if this is awkward.”_

                Makoto can’t let Rin’s words out of his head. “I just-”

 

                Makoto felt Haruka’s hands on his face, when he turned to look at him, he felt something brushed his lips and Haruka’s face was close. Too close that their noses touch. It was a kiss. Makoto felt heat crept on his face and hurriedly pulled away. “Wh-what are you doing? You’re not helping!”

 

                Haruka himself was confused. _Did I just…?_

 

                “It’s Rin. Isn’t it?”

 

                “What do you mean?”

 

                “You like him. You always do.” Haruka justified his years of observation of Makoto.

 

                “I-um. How did you know?”

 

                “The relay. You were so eager to help him, even if we just met him. I know you for a long time, you’re not the kind to just involve yourself too much with strangers. It was back then, wasn’t it?”

 

                Again Makoto buried his face between his knees. He regretted every single word. He really didn’t want anyone know. But he couldn’t help it, he needed all the help he can get, he was in a mess, he felt like his words bit him back. It was all a matter of feelings, something delicate. What would happen if he hadn’t say any of those words the other night, will he and Rin be together? If he were to answer to Rin’s confession, wouldn’t it be unfair to Nagisa since he already said that he wanted them to stay friends. He said those words because he knew that it was hopeless for his feelings towards Rin. But he was proven wrong. When Rin said that he like guys, Makoto can’t help but feel hopeful. But when Rin suggested all those things, Makoto was frustrated. How can he not be? Rin pictured him dating with almost everyone, when the one Makoto wants is him. The frustration made Makoto so mad with the situation that he blurted something that was out of his control. He thought with that, he could finally move on.

 

                “Nee, Haru. Sorry for saying those things all of a sudden. It had been bothering me. At least my shoulder feels lighter now.”

 

                “Liar.” Haruka said with a serious look on his face. “You’re not okay.”

 

                His words startled Makoto. Usually, he could get away with it, just by saying those reassuring words. Haruka never pry anymore after that. He was not ready for any of this. He kept quiet while getting his guards up.

 

                From Haruka’s point of view, Makoto looked as vulnerable as a lamb lost in a pack of wolves yet somehow had to defend itself. He knew that it was bad for him to force it out of Makoto, but somehow in some way, he wanted to know more. He have had enough of Makoto looking out for everyone yet kept all of the bad things to himself. It felt so bad to see Makoto the way he is today. And all he did was sit and wait for Makoto to open up to him when he knew that  that would be the last thing Makoto would do. Makoto used to be more open about himself, especially when it comes to his fears. Maybe as they grew up, Makoto had learned that Haruka doesn’t really care, and slowly he begin to keep things to himself, yet covered it up with the talk of others to make it seems like it was the same. Haruka had just realized it now, Makoto was not the same as he used to be when they were kids.

 

                Haruka knelt and put his arms around Makoto. He doesn’t care anymore. He wanted Makoto.


	12. Tension

                On another day of joint practice at Samezuka, Haruka had once again made a new time record, but Rin was not there to               grit his teeth at it. Haruka can’t help but feel bored without the shark threatening to break it. Nagisa was seen sometimes huddling with Nitori Aiichirou at the corner of the pool and Rei was on his usual forum with the guys from Samezuka, it seems that his discussion had elevate to more than just swimming strokes since he brought some of his school books.

 

                Makoto did his usual stretching, something felt off to him. Haruka kept staring at the pool water which was glowing more than usual.

 

                “Naa, Nanase, enjoying the view?” Mikoshiba Seijuuro caught his shoulder from behind.

 

                _And as usual, this guy haven’t remove the microphone he swallowed. How the hell can he speak with that high of a volume?_

 

                “They cleaned the pool yesterday. And I heard  from Gou-kun that you have an ardent passion for water. Want the honour of being the first to dive in?”

 

                Haruka’s eyes widen at the suggestion. He turned to look at Makoto gesturing a hopeful sign towards his childhood friend but before Makoto could say anything he went and dive ahead.

 

                “Mikoshiba-buchou, how can you even suggest that? He hasn’t warmed up yet.” Gou called out from behind them.

 

                “Ah, can’t help it, he’s like a kid. Kinda nice to see him looking so content. Look at that. It’s like he is smiling on the inside.” Mikoshiba folded his arms and just watch how Haruka drifted on the water surface.

 

                “See, he is, isn’t he?”  Nagisa popped up from a corner of the pool.

 

                “You too? How long have you been in there?” Gou asked.

 

                “Me and Ai-chan was having this diving competition, loser had to make Rinrin eat 20 pieces of chocolates,” Nagisa waddled a little. “We were both curious about how Rinrin’s reacted to that.”

 

                “Well, good luck with that. He doesn’t seem like it, but Nitori holds the longest breath underwater, we did a contest on this once, we had to buy him lunch the whole week.”

 

                “What? That son of a pixie, acting all helpless and fragile when he had-” Nagisa muttered before diving in.

 

                “Mikoshiba-buchou, mind if I talk to you  about-” Gou slowly tried to reach for Mikoshiba’s arms before a hand gripped her arms away. “Onii-chan…?”

 

                Rin glared at her sister. “Now that I know that it is two-way, I should even keep an eye on you, little missy.”

 

                Mikoshiba reached out his hands and grabbed a handful of Rin’s hair.

 

                “Ow ow ow!” Rin yelped in pain. “What’s the big idea?”

 

                “Rin-san, your hair!” Rei called out from afar. Rei was waiting for Rin all this time since Rin promised that he’d share some of his Butterfly stroke secrets before they started.

 

                Rin’s usual below-ear-length hair had disappeared. He had cut it, now his hair is much like Rei’s. He planned to cut it like Haruka’s but his bangs are too in-the-way. It wasn’t awful looking, just unusual.

 

                “I just wanted to make sure. What is up, Matsuoka? Did you get your heart broken or something?” Mikoshiba explained after apologizing for pulling a handful of Rin’s hair.

 

                Rin looked at Makoto by reflex when Mikoshiba asked him. He wasn’t in the mood for anything on that day. Especially not after he saw his sister trying to make a brave move on his own captain.

 

Makoto froze at the sight of Rin when he first entered the pool area. Rin had looked different, neat and his face fully exposed. Did Rin took his advice on cutting his hair to prevent water resistance?

 

                “Probably. But who cares about that? I’m definitely winning against you today, Haru!” Rin challenged the drifting Haruka.

 

                _Ouch. Probably?_

                Upon seeing Rin, Haruka can’t help but feel challenged as usual.  But today, Rin actually cut his own hair for the sake of winning against him makes him even more challenged than the usual days.  Maybe he could actually beat Haruka this time. Haruka can’t afford to lose, he just lost to Rin a few days ago when he knew, all along, Makoto had liked Rin. He looked at Makoto who is now giving his usual assuring smile, but what’s that? His smile was not his usual smile, it’s not honest at all. Makoto turned away from him after a few seconds of looking at Rin.

 

                _Did Rin said something?_ Haruka wondered. Honestly, he only heard the part where Rin challenged him and nothing more before that.

 

                Makoto approached Rin with a storm in his chest. Nervous. He hadn’t seen Rin after his confession. “Nee, Rinrin. Can’t believe you would cut your hair for this.” Nagisa suddenly pounced Rin from behind.

 

                “N-Nagisa! You’re heavy!” Rin hurriedly tried to untangle Nagisa off him. Unlike Haruka, he hates excessive skin touching on the other parts of his body except hands on either his arms or on his back. On occasions that is. And especially from Nagisa. “Well, if it’s a theory, why not try it. I’m beating Haru today, I can feel it.”

 

                “W-well, good luck Rin, ” Makoto approached them with his usual assuring smile and a thumbs up.

 

                Rin looked at Makoto for a few seconds and turned to the platform after giving Makoto a lazy two-fingers salute and a nod. Without saying a word, even changing his expressions.

 

                Makoto was speechless. He didn’t expect a cold shoulder treatment from Rin. At least, he thought that it’s not a cold shoulder treatment. But, something felt off between Rin and him. Makoto had expected a usual retort, or a smile, or anything Rin would reply to him.

 

                It was until the joint practice ended, when the Iwatobi Swim club was on their way back home, that’s when Makoto realized that Rin was ignoring him. Sure they high-fived when Rin won the race with Haru by 2 seconds, but Rin didn’t even look at him. When they look at each other, Rin didn’t smile. When Makoto smiled at him, Rin would find someone else to talk to. Makoto didn’t want to think badly of Rin, maybe it’s not on purpose.

 

                _Probably._

                Makoto stopped. There was a lump in his throat. _Maybe he is._

                Makoto hoped that he was dreaming. Makoto prayed that he was dreaming. Rin was there, hanging out on their usual group dates with Haruka, Nagisa, Rei, Gou and himself, but it had been two weeks had they interacted with each other. Makoto did prompted Rin into conversation at times, but the redhead never replies to him, never directly. He covered it up so good that only Makoto and he knew that he never replied to Makoto.

 

                Rin and Makoto walked side by side after their outing. Haruka was walking behind them. He had noticed that something was off between the two of them, it had been bothering him for quite sometimes. Makoto hardly smiles when Rin is around. He smiles on occasions, but not like before, and Rin on the other hand sometimes act way too over the top when he is with them.

 

                “Nee, Haru-chan? Is something going on between the two of them? Rin is weird and Makoto always looks sad.” Nagisa whispered.

 

                “Seems to me like they are fighting or something. Their behavioural pattern shows sign of tension between them.” Rei butted into Nagisa’s question.

 

                “Fight? Mako-chan? I don’t think so,” Nagisa exclaimed loudly in surprise.

 

                “Did you call me, Nagisa?” Makoto turned around.

 

                “Are you and Rin fighting?”


	13. Fountain

“Are you guys fighting?” Nagisa asked again, this time Rin turned to face them.

 

                “A-are we, Rin?” Makoto hoped that Rin would reply to him directly.

 

                “Makoto didn’t bite me and I didn’t scream at him. No, we’re not fighting.” Rin said, nonchalantly. “Plus, I’m stopping by his place later.”

 

                Haruka can’t help but feel worried. Makoto’s expression seems out of place all the time today. “Well, me to-”

 

                “No, you don’t, Haru. Don’t you have an art piece you need to work on today.” Rin cut him off.

 

                _Drats._ Haruka knew something is going to happen between the two. He already knew that both their feelings are mutual, but the other party didn’t know. He wouldn’t want anything to happen between the two. No way will Makoto, the person he just found out that he had a crush on fall onto the hands of his long-time rival, Rin. _Dammit, that art piece! Why would the due date be tomorrow?_ He had been on break of working on the piece due to the famous artist block. He looked around for some inspiration, because once he had the idea going on, he could finish the thing in a flash. The faster he overcome the block, he could go to Makoto’s and stop whatever Rin had had in mind. Even if Rin didn’t go to Makoto’s to work on this issue, he knew Makoto would be very bothered afterwards. Heaven knows how bothered Makoto ticked him.

 

                That’s when he saw a fountain with crystal clear water forming tiny ripples as if calling Haruka. He attempted to strip but forgot that he wasn’t wearing any swimsuit underneath since he already took two dives today, all his spares already wet. Still, the water tempted him in a way that is mocking, so he ran towards it, hoping that he didn’t strip by reflex.

 

                “Haruka -senpai!” Rei ran after him to stop him from jumping into the water. “That is public property!”

 

                When he stopped a second with an attempt to leap, a sudden splash of water stopped him from diving. A figure fell into the fountain, clothes still intact. A girl, with shoulder length raven black hair slowly stood up, wet.

 

                “The water looks clear, but this fountain is not well managed,” she said. She climbed out of the fountain, soaked and unable to be identified due to her bangs fully sticks onto her face. “It’s not enjoyable.”

 

                “Mizu! There you are.” Another girl ran towards her, she was slightly chubby and familiar.

 

                “Ah, Maya-chan.” Makoto exclaimed. She lives in their neighbourhood, Makoto sometimes walks by her home which he would be greeted by her mother and had small talk. She is a family friend but she went to a boarding school quite far from home. “Are you on a break?”

 

                “Ah, Makoto-kun. Yeah, I was showing my cousin around Iwatobi, she will be attending your school this week. She might be your classmate. Nee, Mizu-” Maya turned around but her cousin was gone. Another splash is heard, her cousin jumped in another fountain not far from the first one. “I’m so sorry, I’ve got to go. Maybe next time. She’s always like this. She had this extreme affinity for water.”

 

                “Kind of like someone we know.” Rin added with a grin, which was replied by a deathly yet pokerfaced glare from Haruka that doesn’t seem scary yet it brings goosebumps. Haruka turned back to see the girl with the extreme affinity towards water.

 

                In that particular second, the girl splashed out of the water for a gasp of air.

 

_Thump!_

Oh, he will finish that art piece before Rin can do anything at Makoto’s.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things just go out of hand...


	14. Realization

He was right. Haruka knew when he had the inspiration, he can actually finish his art piece with lightning speed and it is 15 minutes before 9. But Haruka felt so deprived of water, he had been working on his art piece as soon as he got home and had never been in contact with any water since. He grabbed the water bottle he kept near his work station just in case and gulp what he thought was just a sip. He felt like dying, the taste of water is different. His senses were all jumbled up due to the oil paint and thinner vapour spreading in his house. No choice.

 

                There he was, in front of the Tachibana’s house on a school night bringing his school uniform with him and some supplies and toiletries. He knew it was bad to knock on their door like this, but he had to, he can’t stay at home, not when he can’t enjoy water. Another hour with water tasting like chemicals he can probably die.

 

And Makoto by chance opened the door before he could even knock. “Haru?”

 

                “My house stinks, can I stay over?” as curt as Haru can ever be. He hated dallying with anything, as long as he gets the message across to the other, he would not going to sugar coat anything. Pain in the ass as he always thought it would be.

 

                “S-sure, I guess. I see you brought your uniform with you. Wait, stink?”

 

                “Art piece for tomorrow. Are you going somewhere?” Haruka stared at the jacket Makoto held in his hand.

 

                “Ah, well-” Makoto was going to say something but he had a very brief pause as if he changed his mind before continuing his sentence. “No. I was just trying to breathe some fresh air… I, uh, crammed my head a bit with some English words. Rin was here a while ago.”

 

                Haruka was amazed by how good and fluent Tachibana Makoto’s lie was lately. If not for his telepathy between him and Makoto, he could be fooled by Makoto’s innocent smile and overlook his worried expression when he said ‘Rin’. Haru wasn’t going to say anything. Something did happen between Makoto and Rin, and by the looks of Makoto, Haruka couldn’t hardly tell who is at fault. But knowing that Makoto cancelled what he thought he could do to save the situation, most likely it was Rin’s. it’s not that Haruka didn’t care on what had happened, he cared, a lot in fact. But the chemicals played with his head and all he can think of right this moment is water. The crystal clear calm body of water.

 

                “Makoto, can I soak in your tub?” Haruka paused for a while as he realized that on a chilly night like this, the chances he’ll get to soak in one is near zero since he will never soak in hot water. But he could always try. “Please.”

 

                Makoto tried to be strict and say no, but that glimmer in Haruka’s eyes when he said please is something he can’t compromise. “Fifteen minutes including drying and changing.” He sighed.

 

                Haruka never really stick to the fifteen minutes time, he exited the bathroom after nearly fifty minutes without bothering to dry his hair. He walked into Makoto’s room to find Makoto pacing with his phone in his hand. “Haru, dry your hair will you?”

 

Makoto approached Haruka pulling him towards the bed and took Haruka’s towel from his shoulder. It’s not like Haruka wanted Makoto to dry his hair, but he likes it anyway. How Makoto’s large hands wrap the towel around his head and gently dabbing his hair dry.

 

                “Ouch!” Haruka winced.

               

                “Sorry, Haru.”

 

                “Makoto, how long do you want to keep this up? You can always talk to me, like you always do.” Haruka was grateful for ever having the telepathic abilities to read Makoto. He always has this ability, but Makoto used it more often than he did.

 

                Makoto stopped silent. He was in conflict. Haruka knew that Makoto never ever wanted anyone to know about what he had been keeping, but he reached his limit. “I-I think I did something wrong.”

 

                “With Rin, I felt so overwhelming I- I think I really do like Rin.” Without looking at Makoto, Haruka heard that Makoto’s voice was shaking as if tears were already pooling. “It just felt so right, but he is just a friend. And should be-”

                Haruka grabbed Makoto’s chin from below and pulled him till their lips met. That time Haruka was not sure of what he did and what he felt, but this time, he knew all that. He knew he wanted Makoto.

 

                “Makoto, I like you.”


	15. Stubborn

               “Go out with me.” Haruka looked at Makoto straight in his eyes, he tried hard to get his message across.

 

                Makoto pulled and looked away flustered, hand on the back of his neck, “Haru, you know, we-”

 

                “I don’t care. We’re already practically married, anyone can see that, I don’t think it will change what people think of us.”

 

                “I-it’s not like that-“

 

                “We can also keep it as a secret, no one will know, we can still act like we used to, just a change in status. We can kiss too.”

 

                Makoto was now as red as a tomato.”Haru!”

 

                “I can tell that you like it.”

 

                “It’s us. How I view you and how you view me. It will change that and I don’t want to.” Makoto walked towards his window in attempt to get some fresh air, it was all too overwhelming for him to keep his cool in just one night. First, with Rin and now, Haruka. He knew Haruka can be childish even it seems like he is the most mature in the group in appearance. “And there’s also that thing I said to everyone, I don’t want to be the one who breaks his principle. So, Haru, please understand.”

 

                “But it’s eating you back now.”

 

                “I know, learned my lesson not to say anything out of impulse.”

 

                “You are an idiot, you know that? What about Rin then?”

 

                “I don’t think it will happen anytime- Ever.”

 

                “You’re not going to tell me anything about what happened with him, huh?”

 

                “I’m curious of what you paint for that weird art competition”

 

                Haruka sighed. Makoto is really stubborn whenever this issue came up. Frustrated as he is, he also like the relationship he is in now with Makoto. Close. “First of all, it’s not weird. It’s a rare one of a kind open art competition the new art gallery hosted and those who win will have their art piece shown in the gallery’s premiere.”

 

                “And you participated because…?” Makoto’s voice implying sarcasm on Haruka’s nature of not being stood out to actually try to make a name in the gallery. Makoto wouldn’t ever dream  of seeing this side of Haruka since it seems like forever Haruka had been Haruka.

 

                “The art club’s advisor proposed me to,” Haruka looked at Makoto who was waiting for a longer explanation. _Curse you, telepathy._ “And I accepted because _He_ will be there.”

 

                The _He_ in statement was a painter that Haruka admired since they were in middle school. The painter born and raised in Iwatobi, making his name in the art world with paintings almost everything inspired from Iwatobi and recently, _He_ developed a unique art that consist of creative use of water. Haruka wanted him to be his mentor when he decided that he will pursue in art in his choice of career. Makoto was amazed at how Haruka can talk with much enthusiasm over a long period of time about this one guy who paints with water, but that just one time and Makoto never heard of the name anymore, so he can’t really say he knew the name of that painter.

 

                “And he might notice me.” Haruka looked down, blushing. In a few seconds he glared at Makoto after hearing a chuckle escaped the taller teen, “You saw nothing.”

 

                Just after Makoto switched off the lights after Haru had made himself comfortable in the futon, and just before Makoto starting to doze off, there was a low voice, but clear as a day.

 

                “Makoto, I’m not giving up on you. I won’t lose to Rin.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you can see up to this point, I'm not a good writer. I'd love to write good stories, but I'm not up to that level yet. I'll keep writing. Comments are most welcome, even the harshest. I want to improve..


End file.
